On My Own
by KadyAngel
Summary: Shadow Kiss happened, but Dimitri was never turned.  Instead, he left Rose, with some surprising consequences.  What happens when he comes back?
1. Chapter 1

**Here's more of the description.**

**Dimitri never turned strigoi. But the cabin happened. And then Dimitri left, with Tasha. They've been gone for four years. And then they come for a visit, and stumble upon four new things in Rose's life.**

**Okay, for clarification, not sure how, but Rose met Sydney, and her dad, and Dimitri's family. It'll just work for the story. So make up some scenario…**

**Yeah, I know this type of thing has been done a million times… but I was bored.**

**Anyway, enjoy.**

"Mommy!" screamed Kassi, tears streaming down her face. "Mommy, mommy!"

"Kassi, baby, what's wrong?" I asked, leaning down to look into her eyes.

"Mase, he—he hit me because I wanted to watch my show first," she sobbed.

"Where did he hit you?" I sighed.

She pointed to a red mark on her arm. Mase could really hit. But not as hard as Angela. Ange, we called her.

I called in my kids.

"Mason Christian Hathaway, what did you do to your sister?" I demanded, sitting Kassi on my lap.

"Which one?" he asked, trying to avoid trouble.

"You know which one," I said sternly.

"Yeah, you hit Kassi!" Mike exclaimed, hugging his sister.

I had four kids. All born at the same time. They were Dimitri's kids. Mason Christian Hathaway, or Mase. Michael Adrian Hathaway, or Mike. Angela Vasilisa Hathaway, or Ange. And Kassidy Viktoria Hathaway, or Kassi.

I loved them all.

Their father didn't know he was a father. He had left with Tasha. Just a week after we'd had sex. I'd found out almost a month later. And somehow, I ended up with four babies. They were my miracles.

For the first few months, they'd reminded me so much of Dimitri that it hurt. But now, it was okay. I remembered him, but only the good parts.

The first little while, before I'd found out I was pregnant, I was so depressed that I had thoughts of killing myself.

"Apologize to her, Mason," I told him. He sighed.

"Sorry Kassi," he looked at his feet.

I laughed, and Lissa slunk into the room.

"Rose. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" she exclaimed.

My breath caught in my throat.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, did I mention, I am _so_ sorry?"

I stood, put my hands on her shoulders, and forced her to look at me. "What? What is it?"  
She bit her lip. "I'm so, so, so sorry. Tasha and Dimitri are coming here… for Christmas. _I'm sorry!_"

Her, Christian, Adrian, my mother, and father, Mia, and Eddie knew that Dimitri was the father.

We lived at court. And had houses that were joined through a tunnel. The tunnel was pretty, and made of reinforced glass.

The houses were huge, and had many guest bedrooms. The kids and I had one, and Adrian lived with us in a guest room. While his house was built. The plans were just finished.

Lissa and Christian lived together. Lissa had a two year old baby, Krista Rose, and she was pregnant again. Seven months. Twins. Two boys. God, we were going to have a lot of kids running around the house.

I let my breathing return to a semi-normal pattern.

"When are they getting here?" I asked, waving the kids to go play.

"Tomorrow. Christian just told me. He tried to keep her away, but she hasn't been here for Christmas in a while, and she wanted to see Christian," Lissa looked guilty.

"Liss, it's okay. I've gotta see Adrian," I told her, hugged her, and walked out of the room. "One more thing… how long are they staying?"  
"A month?"

I nodded and walked out. I walked to Adrian's room, and knocked. He opened the door.

"Did you hear?" I inquired, sitting on his bed and looking at him.

"That Belikov and Tasha are coming to visit? Yeah, I heard. Just a few minutes ago. Lissa went to tell you. That's why I didn't."

"Can… can you… pretend—" I broke off.

"Are you asking me if I can pretend those kids are mine?" Adrian grinned.

I nodded, unable to speak.

"Of course, Rose. Anything for you. Does this mean that we have to pretend we're in love?" he smiled wider.

"I guess so."

He hugged me. We were ridiculously close. Christian, Lissa, and Adrian had helped me through the pregnancy.

I had given my children their names as middle names. And then Viktoria as a middle name because of Dimitri's sister. I needed one of them to have a Russian middle name.

I walked down the stairs, where I smelled dinner cooking. Christian and Lissa were in the kitchen, and Lissa was talking to my kids, and to her little girl. They were eating Mac and Cheese, and pot roast was cooking. My favorite. Probably a pity dinner. Adrian had his arm wrapped around my waist.

"Okay, everyone, listen up. I'm not telling Dimitri," I looked to Christian and Lissa. "Kids, Adrian is your daddy until the guests leave. They are coming tomorrow. Adrian is daddy, okay?"

They nodded slowly. They were smart.

"I'm sorry, Rose," Christian told me.

"It's okay. I would have had to face this sooner or later," I smiled, a small smile.

We ate, and made small talk. Then, after dinner, we moved some of Adrian's things into my room. We had to put on a show. Just in case.

Adrian slept in his bed that night. The last night. He had quit drinking and smoking, except on occasion. It was to set a good example for the kids.

It was sweet of him.

After I put the kids to bed, and waited for them to fall asleep, I laid in bed, and waited for sleep to come.

Finally, I fell asleep.

The kids woke me in the morning.

"Mommy, Mommy!" Ange cried.

"Wake up!" Mase shouted.

"Mom!" Kassi exclaimed.

"Wake the crap up!" Mike told me.

"Language, Mike," I said instinctually, and I sat up. Lissa walked through the door, Christian behind her, holding a tray of food.

I smiled when Christian handed it to me. Adrian walked in next, and sat beside me. He kissed my forehead.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Adrian grinned.

I grinned back and started to eat.

Christian sighed. "Time to go pick _them_ up from the airport."

The smile dropped off my face. "Have fun."

"I won't."

"I'm staying here, with you, Rose. A few more minutes of best friend time before they come and we put on our hostess faces," Lissa gave me a sympathetic look.

"Alright, leave me to go, on my own," Christian rolled his eyes.

"Rose needs me more than you do," Lissa pointed out.

"True. Sorry again, Rose. I'll be back in two hours or so," Christian told us, and walked out. I heard the door shut.

I finished eating, and got dressed. I wore my favorite black jeans, and a blood red t-shirt, with a deep V neck. And my shoes were my black platforms, that made me look five inches taller than I was. So I looked six foot or so. Which was an improvement on my five foot seven height.

I put on some makeup, neutral, and soft. Then I threw my hair into a high ponytail.

I walked down to hang with Adrian and Lissa, and the kids. Lissa held Krista, and I played games with my kids and Adrian. Two hours passed too quickly.

The door opened and shut.

"We're home," Christian shouted.

I braced myself, and turned around to see the people I had tried so hard to avoid.

**What did you think? Reviews please!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two is here! Woot!  
**

I turned and saw Dimitri and Tasha, side by side. They weren't touching, but they were close enough to annoy me.

I felt Adrian's arm wrap around my waist.

"Lissa! You're huge!" Tasha exclaimed, and hugged Lissa.

My kids sensed my distress, and they came to me, and curled around me in a protective-type circle.

"They're cute!" Tasha exclaimed, looking at them. "Whose are they?" she looked at Lissa. She knew Lissa had Krista Rose, but she wasn't sure about my kids. Where they had been.

"Mine," I nodded, and Tasha's gaze switched to me lightening fast.

Dimitri's eyes widened, and satisfaction ran through me.

"And mine," Adrian smiled.

Hurt flashed through Dimitri's eyes so quickly I wasn't sure if I'd even seen it. "Yours?" Dimitri asked, looking between the two of us.

"Of course. Let me introduce you guys. This is Mason Christian Hathaway, or Mase," I pointed to Mase. "Michael Adrian Hathaway, or Mike," I smiled at Mike. "Angela Vasilisa Hathaway, or Ange," I paused. "And Kassidy Viktoria Hathaway, or Kassi. They're… quadruplets? I think that's the word. They're four years old."  
"They're darling!" Tasha grinned. "I hope when I have kids they're that cute!"

"We can only hope," my resentment towards her sparked, and I felt Lissa send calming thoughts through the bond.

Christian reentered the room. "Your rooms are set up."

Room_s?_ Thank god. That reassured me.

I still felt so much toward Dimitri. It would never let up. No, never. I was sure of that… but maybe, one day, my heart would heal enough for me to let Adrian or someone else in.

What hurt the most was that Mase looked exactly like I imagined a Dimitri at his age. It hurt to look at him, sometimes. But it got better… after a while. I was surprised that Dimitri didn't notice the likeness.

Christian led them off, and I felt Adrian's arms tighten around me.

"Are you okay?" he murmured in my ear.

"Yes," I answered.

"Liar."

_Rose? You alright?_ Lissa asked in my mind. We could communicate both ways now. She slipped into my mind from time to time.

_No. But I will be eventually._

_Okay._ She knew not to push me.

The kids went back to playing. And Adrian released his grip on my waist. I walked upstairs, and splashed some water on my face.

Everyone let me have my space, which I was thankful for.

Of course, eventually, Lissa called me down for dinner. I had to eat with them, of course.

I walked downstairs, almost hiding behind Lissa. Finally, I sat across from Dimitri, and beside Adrian and Lissa. Christian sat beside Lissa, and Tasha sat beside Dimitri. Well, Lissa sat at the head of the table, anyway…

The kids had their own table, and kept coming over and giving Adrian and I hugs. My little angels always knew how to make me feel better. And I was thankful for them.

It just hurt to have to be here, sitting across from the man who had hurt me so badly, making polite chit chat… well; I wasn't talking to him or anyone else unless spoken to directly.

"So, how have you been?" Tasha asked conversationally.

"Well, we've been great," Lissa said, trying to smile. Her natural charisma made people think she was sincere, so Tasha returned the smile. She wasn't a fan of Tasha, ever since she heard my account of her. We didn't hate her… but we didn't love her either.

"That's good."

"Mommy, Daddy!" Ange shouted. "Can you come here?"

I stood from the table, and Adrian came with me, his hand tangled in mine.

"What's up, Ange?" I asked her, leaning down, and bringing Adrian with me.

Ange leaned closer, and whispered in my ear. "That man keeps looking at you, mommy. I don't like him," she eyed Dimitri. "He looks like he's going to attack daddy."

I bit back a laugh. "It's okay, Ange. I know. But, it's okay. He isn't going to attack daddy," I murmured and added a _yet_ in my mind.

DPOV

Christian picked us up from the airport. The car was small, and it had a car seat in it.

From his two year old daughter, Krista Rose.

I was jittery about seeing Rose. I had left, and admittedly, it had been for her own good… I had wanted nothing more than to stay with her… but I couldn't. It would have gotten her expelled. So I'd had to leave.

We'd visited before, but Rose had been away, hiding, or on vacation every time. We hadn't visited that much, twice. Once every two years. For one day, or two. This time, Rose would be there.

And I was dreading it. What if she had moved on?

I hadn't. Tasha and I were just friends. She understood that. She didn't ask for more. She didn't pressure me. She even had a boyfriend.

I thought about her the entire ride, while Christian and Tasha caught up.

Finally, we arrived. I got the bags out of the car, and Christian led us inside.

"We're home!" he shouted.

I looked around, and Rose was standing up, looking at us, Adrian Ivashkov's hand around her waist.

All I wanted to do was kill him. But I refused to give in.

Finally, I took my eyes off of Rose. There were five kids, not just one. Two boys, three girls. One was Krista Rose. The others were a bit older than her.

"They're cute!" Tasha exclaimed, and looked at the kids I was looking at. "Whose are they?"

"Mine," Rose nodded.

I felt my eyes widen, and Tasha switched her gaze to Rose.

"And mine," Ivashkov smirked.

She had moved on. "Yours?" I looked between Rose and Ivashkov.

"Of course. Let me introduce you guys. This is Mason Christian Hathaway, or Mase. Michael Adrian Hathaway, or Mike. Angela Vasilisa Hathaway, or Ange. And Kassidy Viktoria Hathaway, or Kassi. They're… quadruplets? I think that's the word. They're four years old."  
"They're darling!" Tasha grinned. "I hope when I have kids they're that cute!"

"We can only hope," Rose's voice had venom in it.

Christian reentered the room. "Your rooms are set up."

Tasha and I left, and got set up.

Rose had moved on. She'd had kids with Ivashkov. How could she?

**I didn't feel like going through the dinner scene again. Yep. There's chapter two. Review please? Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

**New chapter is here! Whoohoo!  
Twitter me. KatrynaWilliams.**

**Reviews are amazing! I love them all!**

RPOV

There had been something funny in the air all night. It was tense, and I hated it.

I missed the days when everything was natural. Easy. But it had been too long, and there was too much that was secret.

I hated having Dimitri here.

He had left me. For her. I had no reason to hate her, but I did. I absolutely and positively did.

Dinner ended quickly, and Adrian, the kids, and I had all gone upstairs. Adrian and I put the kids to bed, and we went to my—our room.

We sat on the bed. And just talked.

"Are you okay, Rose?" he asked, his jade green eyes staring into my brown ones.

"No. But that doesn't matter. What matters is that I can hide everything I'm feeling, hide the truth until they leave," I told Adrian, staring right back at him.

"I hate to say this, I really do, but I think Belikov deserves to know."

"I don't. He left me broken. He didn't call, didn't come back. I don't want him to come back for the kids. I don't want to have to see him every day. Or, worse, he wouldn't come back. He'd leave again. I couldn't deal with that, couldn't let him do that to the kids. To everyone. I just… _can't_ Adrian. You have to understand," I was so emotional lately. Seeing Dimitri brought everything to the surface.

I still loved him. So much. I would never be able to let go.  
And I hated knowing that he didn't feel the same way anymore. I would have given anything for him to have felt the same way… but he just… didn't. And I couldn't fix that.

"You still love him," Adrian stated.

I sighed, and looked at the ceiling. "Yes."

"Why? Why him and not me?"

"I don't know. You don't know how much I _wish_ it were you, Adrian. That would make it all perfect. We could be happy… but I don't love you that way. It's not enough."

"I know," he sighed. I laid down, and so did he. I laid my head on his chest, innocently. There was nothing sexual between us.

And I knew that, most likely, there never would be.

I fell into a deep sleep.

Adrian didn't enter my dreams. He knew that I'd rather be alone.

When I woke, sun was streaming into the room, Adrian was gone, and Kassi was cuddled up beside me, with Ange.

They were sleeping, or Ange was. Kassi was awake.

"Ange had a nightmare. We came in here because Uncle A—I mean Daddy was awake. He had Mase and Mike," Kassi whispered. "I wanted to stay with Ange, because she needed company."

Kassi was such a little sweetheart.

"You're such a good girl, Kassi," I whispered back, kissing her forehead.

"I thought I heard voices," the door opened, and Adrian stood there, with a paper bag in hand. He handed it to me, it was full of doughnuts.

Ange woke up, and we dealt out the food.

"Where is everyone?" I asked Adrian.

"Lissa wants to go shopping. So you've got an hour to be ready and in the car with the kids," Adrian smiled. "She told me to tell you."

I sighed. "Awesome. Just… awesome."

"Mike and Mase are both bathed, and they ate, and they're both running around," Adrian told me.

"Thanks. I'll do Ange and Kassi, and we'll be ready to go soon."

Adrian walked out of the room, leaving Ange, Kassi, and I to finish eating.

"Mommy?" Ange asked.

"Yes, darling?" I responded automatically.

"Why are we pretending Adrian's daddy?"

I took in a sharp breath. "Because it's not right to not have a daddy, and we just want to tell everyone that Adrian's daddy, to make it simpler."

Ange was smart, and so was Kassi, but they were little, so they couldn't see through me, and they bought it.

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I had been holding.

We ate, and I got them ready for shopping. Everyone was going. I just wanted to stay far, _far_ away from Dimitri and Tasha. For many reasons.

I didn't really want to go, but I had to. To keep up appearances.

We were strapped in the cars, and we took off to the mall.

We wondered through shops, never really splitting up.

Dimitri came up behind me, as I watched Lissa try on some dresses. "We need to talk," he murmured.

"No, we don't," I said, never looking at him.

"Yes, Roza, we do," he insisted.

"No, we _don't._ What is there to talk about? The fact that you left me?"

"Roza… it's not…"

"Fine. We'll talk. Later. When I say so. Now back off and give me some goddamned space!" I exclaimed, still barely above a whisper. Adrian pulled me closer to him.

Suddenly, I decided to do something, that was stupid. I leaned closer to Adrian, and kissed him directly on the lips.

He kissed back, and then pulled away.

"Not here, my dear," he said, playing along. He knew this wasn't real, and I felt bad for toying with him like this. But he knew that I had to do what I had to do.

When we left the mall, Mike and Kassi were asleep. Mase and Ange were falling asleep. Being up and around makes them tired.

I smiled at my babies.

We got back soon, and Adrian and I put the kids to bed.

"I'll be back soon. If I'm not back in forty five minutes, come find me, please," I told Adrian.

"You got it, little Dhampir," he smiled, halfheartedly.

"Thank you."

He nodded, and I walked off to find Dimitri.

He was sitting in his room, reading a western. The door had been open. I knocked on it, feeling stupid, and wishing I could just leave. He looked up, and lowered the book. Surprise was written all over his face.

"Roza—" he started.

I bit my lip. But then, I channeled my inner confidence. "You said you wanted to talk, so talk."

**So… what did you guys think? Review please!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's the update.**

**Twitter me. KatrynaWilliams.  
Enjoy.**

"Roza, please don't be like this," he stood up, and walked closer to me. "Just hear me out."

"I said talk. Not beg," my voice was hard, cold, and distant.

I didn't want to be here. Why was I here?

"Roza, I'm sorry."

I snorted. "Yeah, right. You just want to get into my pants again."

"No!" he said, "No. I'm sorry, for everything. But I had to leave, for you. For your future."

I bit my tongue. "Look, I don't know what backwards logic that is, but it's not like anything I've ever heard before. You had to leave to destroy my heart. You had to leave me, for what? So you could sleep with Tasha, until you got bored with her?"  
"Rose, it's not like that. It never was. I don't think of Tasha that way! I never have, Roza, you have to believe me," he was begging.

"I don't. And don't call me Roza. It's Rose. There's no reason for you to call me Roza. Only people I care about can nickname me," I shook my head, disgusted.

"Please, just… please, hear me out," Dimitri's voice was pleading, and his eyes were trying to search my face.

I shook my head. "Never," and I walked out.

I marched back to my room, not listening to anything my heart said. My mind knew I was doing what was right. For me, for my kids.

For everyone around me.

The next morning, Lissa walked into my room, holding Mike. He was smiling.

"Tasha wants to go to dinner tonight. Because she's got news," Lissa shrugged, trying to come of unconcerned, when she was worried for me.

Adrian had already gotten out of bed.

"Alright. Dress nice?" I asked.

"Yeah. If it's not a problem, that is. If it is… you don't have to go," she said.

I knew she had already accepted. I was her guardian.

"It's fine, Liss. I'm fine, I promise," I told her, as she handed me Mike.

"You're a really good liar. To everyone but me."

"I know. But if I keep telling myself it's fine, then… I'll believe it."

The rest of the day passed uneventfully.

So, I got the kids ready. Then I got myself ready. A knee length, tight red dress, with a low v-neck. It tied around my neck, and I wore some black heels with it. I hid my stake in my purse, and put on some makeup.

Red lipstick, eye liner, eye shadow, mascara. Then a necklace Adrian had given me. I frowned, touched up my hair.

"Rose, we're gonna be late!" Adrian called. "Let's go!"  
I frowned a larger frown. "Coming!"

Kassi, Ange, Mase, and Mike were ready, and so was Adrian.

He looked great. His hair was messy, his green eyes looked me up and down as I came down the stairs. I smiled.

"See something you like?" I asked.

"Matter of fact, I do."

"Too bad."

"Don't hold it over my head."

We got to the restaurant, and sat down.

We ate, and made some kind of small talk.

Dimitri's eyes kept glancing over to me, but I ignored him, watching my kids, or talking to Adrian, or Lissa.

Lissa, Christian, and Adrian tried to shield me the entire night.

At the end of the night, Tasha stood up, champagne in hand. She looked at us, to make sure she had our attention.

"Last night, I made a decision," she began, a smile written on her face. "Guardian Belikov and I are moving here. Permanently. The plans are drawn up. It'll be finished in two months. We'll be staying here with you guys until you move."

**Yes, it was short. I know, I'm sorry. Better than nothing. But what did you think?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the update…**

**Twitter me. KatrynaWilliams.**

**Enjoy.**

Oh shit. I couldn't do this! I stood up, almost knocking my chair over.

"I'll, uh…" I darted off.

I walked out of the restaurant, and kicked off my heels as I ran. My house was thirty-seven miles away from where we were. I kept running, and running, and running.

Finally, I was home. My lungs were aching for oxygen, and my legs were screaming at me to stop. I grabbed the spare key from the garden, and walked into the house. I walked to the bathroom, and threw up everything in my stomach.

I cried, and cried.

Sometime later, the door opened.

"Rose? Rose!" Lissa was shouting. She found me on the bathroom floor, sobbing.

"I'm so sorry," she said.

I nodded. "The kids?" I rasped.

"Adrian's putting them to bed. I'm sorry, Rose. I am," she told me. She helped me to my bed. "I'll be back in the morning, okay? Will you be okay?"

I nodded.

Adrian came in and held me.

"We have to stop pretending, Adrian. We can't pretend forever," I sobbed.

"For you, little Dhampir, anything. I could pretend forever, for you. If it made you happy," he cradled me to his chest.

"That's not fair to you. I have to tell him, Adrian," I cried.

"I'm here. I support you."

I must have fallen asleep, because I woke up in Adrian's arms. He was awake.

"Did I wake you?" he asked.  
I shook my head. "No. I'm fine," I said. I got up to shower.

I didn't want to face the world.

Today wouldn't be the day I told him. I would put it off for a while.

I showered and changed. The kids were up.

"Are you okay mommy? You just left last night," Ange said.

I smiled a big, fake smile. "Mommy's fine. She just went for a run."

"Oh. Okay," Ange frowned.

"Mommy, good morning!" Kassi shouted.

"Mommy!" Mase cried.

"Mommy, are you okay?" Mike asked.

"Mommy is fine," I told them firmly. "She just needed a run last night."

I hated talking about myself in third person.

I got them ready to go, and took them to the court nursery. They went there every Tuesday, Thursday, and Sunday.

It was Sunday.

I dropped them off and went back to the house.

"Are you okay, Rose, really?" Adrian asked, handing me a plate of eggs, sausage, pancakes, and toast.

"No. I'm not telling him today, just so you know. Not for a while. A week or two."

"Okay, Rose."

I thought back to my pregnancy. To the past four years. He had moved in to help, with the pregnancy, the kids. Cooked me breakfast, held my hair during morning sickness, held my hand during doctor's appointments. Been at the birth. Everything, he had done everything. And Dimitri hadn't. What right did he have?

None.

No, I owed him nothing. My kids? I owed them everything, and they deserved to have a father. Their real father.

I knew I would keep putting this off. I knew it.

I could barely breathe.  
What if I told him, and he walked away again? I would be broken, and I wouldn't be able to be put back together.

I had to do this, soon. For my kids.  
"Rose?" Adrian asked. "You're a million miles away."

"Sorry," I shook my head.

"Rose!" Lissa shouted, entering the house. She never knocked.

"Kitchen!" I shouted back.

She walked into the kitchen and hugged me. "How are you?"

"Fine."

"Okay. Whatever you say."

"Yes. Whatever I say."

"Hey, I have your shoes," she dangled my heels from her fingertips. "They were outside of the restaurant, so I grabbed them."

"Thanks, Liss," I hugged her.  
"You're going to tell him, aren't you?" she asked.

"Sometime soon. It'll be horrible, but I'll deal," I told her truthfully. "I'll be fine. You know me."

Lissa gave me a smile. "I'm here for you, Rose. We all are."

Adrian had made himself scarce.

"I know. And I'm thankful for that, I just don't think I want to make you guys pick up the pieces," I said.

She nodded. "We'll do it. Gladly. Well, not gladly, we hate seeing you hurt, but you get it."

I smiled. "Yeah, I do. I've got to do something. Later?"

"Of course."

And so I stood up, and walked to find Dimitri.

**What did you think? Review please, and I'll update soon, with a longish chapter.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Alright, so here's the chapter… the one you've all been waiting for!**

**Twitter me, KatrynaWilliams.**

**Anyway…**

**Enjoy.**

He was working at the gym. He was working on a punching bag.

I sighed.

"Dimitri?" I asked, timidly. For a second, he didn't turn, so I thought he didn't hear me. I turned to leave.

"Roz-Rose, what can I do for you?" he asked.

"Can we talk?"

"You want to talk now?"

I just wanted out of this. But I knew there was no 'getting out' because I had dug myself into a hole here. "Yes. I've…I've got something to say."

"I'll shower and meet you in…?"

"My room. I'll wait there. Half hour?"

"Yes. A half hour."

I nodded and turned to leave.

"Roza?"

I turned back to him.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Thank you."

I nodded again and left. He wouldn't be thanking me in a few minutes.

A half hour passed too quickly, I had told Adrian and Lissa what I was going to be doing. They supported me. They were taking care of the kids while I talked to Dimitri.

I heard a knock at the door.

"Come in," I whispered. Then I pulled my 'Rose Hathaway attitude' to the surface. I let it give me confidence. "Come in," my voice was stronger, more confident. More daring. I knew that this discussion would be difficult, and he'd hate me, but he would be able to love the kids. I knew that this would go well for them, and that was all that mattered. They deserved to have their real father around. They deserved to know who he was, I told myself. This is for my little angels. I would do this for no one else.

"Can I talk first?" Dimitri asked from the doorway.

I bit my lip. "Yeah, sure."

He froze, but then I saw him make a decision. I could see the decisiveness in his eyes. "Roza, I love you. Nothing has happened between Tasha and I. I've missed you, so, so much. I don't know what to say. I want to be part of your family, as a friend. I _know_ you're with Adrian, I know, but Roza, please, let me be your friend," he said in a rush. He looked like he was losing confidence. But he had no idea how much confidence I was losing. I couldn't breathe, it felt like something was crushing me.

He loved me.

He hadn't done anything with Tasha.

He wants to be part of my life.

"I'm not," I mumbled, confidence gone. No smart remarks or witty comebacks. No confidence. Just whatever I could muster. My voice was shaky, and I still couldn't breathe right.

"What?" I wasn't sure if he hadn't hurt me, or if he didn't understand.

I sighed and took a deep breath. I tried to speak louder. "I'm not with Adrian."

His eyes lit up. "You're not?"

"No."  
He rushed forwards and kissed me, shoving his lips to mine. He tangled his hands in my hair, and leaned down to meet me. I melted into his body, and felt my emotions go completely haywire. Everything about me yearned for him. Wanted him. He pulled me closer, and we were pressed against each other, so tight there was no room in between us.

Then we broke apart. I had pulled away.

"Wait. Stop. What is this leading to?" I asked.

"I want to be more than a friend to you, Roza. I do. But only if you'll let me."

"How do I know you won't leave again?" I demanded.

He laughed. It wasn't a humorous laugh, just a little chuckle. "Where would I go?"

I shrugged, thinking. He was guarding Tasha. She was moving here. I was here, Lissa, Christian, Adrian, Eddie, and Mia were here. "Good point." I thought. "Wait. You could go home to Russia."

"Well, then you would know where to find me. I'd let you kill me if you could find me. So where is this going, Roza?" he asked, his beautiful brown eyes looking into mine.

I sighed. "I don't know. I'll let you decide… after we talk."

"What did you want to talk about?"

I couldn't breathe. I didn't want to speak. Something was sitting on my chest, and I couldn't think straight.

"The kids…"

"What about the kids?" he asked, sounding worried. "Are they sick? Are they okay?"

I swallowed hard, and took a deep, calming breath.

"Roza? Answer me!" he demanded hysterically.

He didn't even know they were his. And yet, he was so concerned for them. It made my heart beat faster.

"They aren't Adrian's," I whispered.

"Then whose are they?" he asked. "It's okay, Roza, I won't hold it against you if you had a one night stand, or a fling with a Moroi. That's all in the past now."

"It's worse than a fling or a one night stand." My voice was so quiet that I could barely hear myself.

"What's worse? Did someone… do something to you?" Dimitri demanded. His voice was furious.  
"No. Dimitri… I don't know how to say this."

"Roza, it's okay. Say it."

"_You're_ the father to my kids. Our kids. _You're_ their dad."

**So… Review please!**


	7. Chapter 7

**The long awaited chapter.**

**Twitter me, KatrynaWilliams.**

**Hope you like it.**

"Excuse me?" Dimitri looked at me like I was crazy.

"The cabin. I got pregnant. And I never wanted to tell you, I didn't really want you to know. It took like a month for me to find out. It's because I'm shadow kissed," I was practically shaking, waiting for the outburst.

"Why didn't you tell me?" his voice was gentle on the surface, but sharp underneath. "Don't you think I had the right to know?"

"Dimitri, I'm sorry. I'm really, _really_ sorry. But you didn't love me, and I didn't want you to come back unless _you_ wanted to. I didn't want you to be forced to come back, because then… then you'd hate me. Then I'd have to see you every day, and I thought neither of us wanted that. So I kept my mouth shut. I didn't say a single word. Everyone knows… but you and Tasha. My mother, my father…"

"You should have told me."

"You shouldn't have left."

"I left for you."

"Don't you think _I_ had the right to know _that?_ You could have told me you were leaving for me, but instead, you just left, made me think you hated me," I said. "I was broken. Hurt. Everyone around me had to pick up what was left. My kids helped me the most out of anyone. I was broken. Beyond just broken."

He shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry for that. I am, but this is a bit bigger than you being heartbroken." He opened his eyes again, to stare me in the eyes.

"It wasn't just that. I considered suicide until I discovered I was pregnant. The first year, they looked so much like you that it hurt. They still do, but now, now, I can deal with it," I told him.

He looked pained now. "They're mine? You're certain?"

I nodded. "Can you forgive me?"

He gave me a small nod. "Roza… I love you. I never stopped. Can _you_ forgive me?"

I frowned. "I don't know…" I trailed off, playfully.

He looked worried, not realizing that I was joking. We had been apart a little too long, for my liking, anyway.

"I'm joking, Comrade."

"Stop calling me that."

"Never. Am I forgiven? For real?"

"Yes. I can't stay mad at you," he gave me a genuine smile, that turned into a small frown. "Have you really forgiven me?"  
I smiled. "Of course. Did you think I was lying before? What does this mean… for the two of us? Are we…?"

There was an unspoken question that flowed between us.

He raised an eyebrow, then he smiled. "Rose, will you go out to dinner with me?"

I gave him a smile back. "Of course. Thank you for asking."

I went to leave to go find Lissa, but Dimitri caught me, and wrapped an arm around my waist.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Lissa. Adrian. Christian. I need to tell them."

He nodded. "I'll come with you."

I resisted the urge to smile, and exited the room. I walked into Lissa's house.

"Yo, Guys!" I shouted, detangling myself from Dimitri, and shoving him into the corner, out of view.

Adrian, Christian, Lissa, Tasha, and the kids showed up on the stairs. Along with Eddie, who was Lissa's other Guardian. He was also dating Mia. She was on vacation for a few weeks, with one of her other friends.

"I told him," was all I said.

"And?" Lissa's voice was shrill, hopeful.

"And what?" I stalled.

"What happened?" Adrian butted in.

Tasha looked confused.

Dimitri came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Oh my god!" Lissa flew down the stairs, and pulled me into a hug. Christian smiled, and Adrian congratulated us.

Tasha looked happy and hugged me, but was still confused.

"What did you tell him, Rose?" Tasha asked.

"The kids aren't Adrian's. They're Dimitri's," I grinned.

"How is that possible?" Tasha demanded.  
"I'm shadow kissed."

"Oh."

This was all turning out okay. I had been nervous about telling Dimitri, but it had been the best decision of my life.

I smiled at Dimitri, and then to Lissa, Adrian, Christian, Tasha, and my—our kids.

Dimitri went up to the kids.

"Hey, Ange, Mase, Mike, Kassi, this is your father," I pointed to Dimitri.

They nodded enthusiastically.

"I thought it was Adrian," Mase said.

"Mason." I reprimanded.

He laughed.

Kassi and Ange ran up to hug Dimitri. Mike followed, and then Mase did too.

Dimitri's smile was blinding. He already loved the kids. Even though he had just met them, and just found out about them.

This was going to be great. My life was taking a turn for the better.

**What did you think? Review, please. Yes, it was short. I know.**

**But review.**


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